July 29, 2012 in Anna's Journey to Life
Introduction: This is the second part of the self-commitment statements of the series I am currently walking based on a memory from when I was a child. In my next post I will add the last part of the self-commitment statements and in posts to come, I will continue opening up the development of the character of seeking for attention, leading up to the play-out of the character “Everybody loves me – I’m a star!
Read parts 1 – 5 here:
I also suggest to read the following blog in conjunction with this blog: http://creationsjourneytolife.blogspot.com/2012/07/day-105-turn-on-television.html
I see, realize and understand that I have been ‘attempting’ to make myself ‘whole’ yet my starting-point has been separation from and of myself and as such I’ve been searching for myself outside myself – in and as the very manifestation of my separation of and from myself and as such I’ve simply been separating myself from myself more by projecting that which I’ve separated myself from, of and as onto others as mirrored reflections of myself where I perceived and experienced the energy that I believed derived from others giving me attention as me getting that which I believed myself to be lacking
I commit myself to stop participating in a desire to get something from someone else as outside and separate from me
I commit myself to, when and as I see that I am experiencing a desire to get something from someone or get something out of someone else, such as recognition, approval, energy, love, attention – to immediately stop myself and stop participating in and as this desire. I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application investigate and get to the bottom of what exactly it is of and as myself that I have separated myself from/of/as into and as a desire to get this from someone else and as such to bring this desire back to myself as I equalize myself to/as/within it here and no longer live in desires separate from me but as a living expression of who I am
I see, realize and understand that when and as I accept and allow myself to project myself outside myself through/as/within my mind, I am in fact separating myself from myself here – as such, I commit myself to, when and as I see that I am projecting myself in/onto something/someone/somewhere outside separate from me here, to stop. I commit myself to stop participating in projections through/as/within my mind.
I see realize and understand that the value and attention I have been giving to movies/TV-series/celebrities, derives from the moment where I realized that the TV was what the adults were giving value to as that was what they were giving attention to and as such I in that moment decided by accepting and believing it to be real/true, that TV is valuable and to give it my attention, because I will get a good positive experience when I do, exactly how I saw the adults having positive experiences when they watched TV
Within this – I commit myself to stop giving value to Movies/TV-series/Celebrities within and through how I give these priority attention as a priority within and as my mind through/as/within my participation in backchat as internal conversations and thoughts as images and in experiences of desire to give my attention to Movies/TV-series/Celebrities in and as my practical participation
I let go of the memory of walking into the room and watching the adults watching a movie and within seeing that they gave the movie attention I compared myself to the movie/TV and created the belief that Movies/TV-series/Celebrities is valuable because of the positive experience it provides that I then decided to give my attention to within and as separating myself from myself here in and as the physical
When and as I experience a desire to watch Movies/TV-series/Celebrities – I stop.
I see, realize and understand that I have accepted, believed, defined and experienced adults as authorities, simply because they are adults based on the idea that adults are more wise, more reasonable and knows the ways of the world better than children – and that I accordingly have defined myself, my beliefs, my desires, my experiences, my values according to that of adults – instead of trusting myself in self-honesty to make decisions based on common sense within and as what is best for all.
I commit myself to, when and as I see that I am perceiving, believing, defining, accepting and experiencing someone as an authority based on me having defined them as such without looking at the point for myself in self-honesty and self-trust – I stop and I look at the point within and as myself in self-honesty and self-trust and make my decision accordingly.
I let go of the belief that adults are intrinsic authorities no matter what they say or do and I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application develop self-trust within looking in self-honesty and common sense at the point I am facing and accordingly make a decision.
I see, realize and understand that adults in and as this world cannot be trusted as authorities simply because they are adults – exactly as anyone standing in an authority position in and as this world cannot be trusted simply because they are standing in and as a role of authority – because otherwise they would have done everything possible to ensure a world that is best for all – and only a person who stands committed to what is best for all and live as such within and without, can be trusted as an authority
Within and as this, I commit myself to investigate what is here for myself and to not accept someone as an authority right off the bat, simply because I have accepted the position they are in as a character/role as agreed to by the common society and me included and I commit myself to question and challenge and expose authority as it is accepted in and as the world
I commit myself to show that only self-authority where a being stands, lives, breathes for and within what is best for all life through and through can be trusted and as such I commit myself to, through writing, self-forgiveness and self-corrective application, establish myself within and as self-trust, self-honesty and self-dignity as a self-authority that can be trusted with life as I stand and live that which is best for all through and through, within as without
I commit myself to stop and step out of my relationship that I have created towards TV as that which I have given value within the energetic experiences that I have generated based on watching TV and giving TV value within and through the attention I’ve given TV as being important
I let go of and release the belief that TV, movies, actors, actresses, celebrities, TV series is important and valuable and that I should give it my full attention to get a good positive experience within and as myself
I let go of and release the memory and the experience I created in the moment, where I compared myself to the TV within and as comparing the attention the adults gave the TV with the attention they gave me that I took personally and defined myself according to
I let go of and release the belief that that which adults give attention to and thereby value is real, valuable and important – and that I accordingly have created, defined, set and accepted my own attention and values according to, within and as accepting adults as authorities over and as me
I see, realize and understand that I have defined attention as something a person gives and thereby gives value to defined as care/interest
I see, realize and understand that I have defined, believed, experienced and accepted that when a person gives me attention it means they are giving me value and as such care and interest
I see, realize and understand that I have defined myself according to the attention others give me or do not give me and that I accordingly have defined my value to and as such my care and interest
I commit myself to stop defining myself according to the attention others give me as in seeing me or looking at me or speaking to me
I commit myself to stop defining my value according to the attention others do not do not give me by seeing me or looking at me or speaking to me
I commit myself to stop defining myself within and according to energetic experiences
I see, realize and understand that I have weighed and measured my value and worth according to how much or how little attention I am getting by a person or a group of people
I commit myself to stop weighing and measuring my value and worth according to how much or how little attention I am getting by a person or a group of people
I see, realize and understand that what I defined myself according to, was not in fact the attention given to me by others and the value they as such gave me, but in fact the energetic experience that I created and derived from getting attention from others, based on the belief/idea/acceptance that when someone gives attention, it means they give value and if they do not give attention, it means that they do not give value
I see, realize and understand that I have defined my value/worth in separation of and from myself here, by projecting it onto others and as such making others responsible for how valuable I am and how valuable I see and experience myself as – while in fact it was all taking place in my own my, where the other person/group were simply either giving me attention by listening to me, looking at me, speaking with me or not
I let go of and release the belief that when people give me attention, they are recognizing my value
I see, realize and understand that I have created and am responsible for the creation of the belief/acceptance of myself as constantly having to get people’s attention so that I can see, define, experience, perceive and accept myself as valuable within and as the energetic experience that I create and derive from people giving me attention
I see, realize and understand that I in the moment I saw the adults giving attention to the movie accordingly compared myself to the movie and thus accepted myself as competing with the movie for the attention of the adults and that I, when I heard them speaking the words “Everybody loves Debbie” created an association and equation within and as my mind, where I believed/accepted that what I was competing with was a girl in the center of attention that everybody loves
And I see, realize and understand that I have created an ideal image that I have tried to live up to so that everybody would love me and I would receive ultimate attention and as such value and as such an ultimate energetic experience of being the center of attention and that everybody loves me
I let go of and release the memory of hearing the words “Everybody loves Debbie” and accordingly created a desire for everybody to love me and a belief that I must get everybody to love me so that I will get attention and as such value and as such a positive energetic experience
I let go of and release the energetic relationship and resonant connection that I have created within and as my mind towards the words “Everybody Loves Debbie” and the subsequent competition and comparison that I have created based on my interpretation of these words
(To be continued)
Give yourself the daily gift of reading the blogs from Creation’s Journey to Life, Earth’s Journey to Life and Heaven’s Journey to Life. Join us at Desteni, where a forum is available 24/7 with support on how to write oneself out in self-honesty and where any questions regarding the Desteni Material will be answered by competent Destonians who are walking their own process. Visit the Destonian Network where videos and blogs are streamed daily. Suggest to also check out the Desteni I Process and Relationship courses for extended training and support. Walk with us in implementing an Equal Money System as a new System on Earth based on Equality as what is Best for All. Let’s Walk!